Twin Flame: Guard Your Heart

I’m hella mad and hurt.. and in ego at the moment, but I need to release some emotional junk.

I made the mistake of going on facebook to delete it and I saw my twin flame’s facebook page.

FACEBOOK IS THE DEVIL

Let me repeat

FACEBOOK IS THE DEVIL.

Stay away from it, that’s all I gotta say.. Instagram too, if you’re friends with your significant other, husband, boyfriend, twin flame. I am not friends with him on either and I DELETED my facebook permanently. It had been deactivated for a year and a half and I had been planning to set aside some time to permanently delete it now and for eternity.

F*** facebook.

I’m SO glad it’s done.  I’ve seen so much destruction come from facebook and I was just over it.. I also saw some good stuff on there, but also some very disheartening stuff on there about some family friends, as well as my twin flame’s stupid little groupies saying how “fine he is.”

I was like:

The f***?!

So now I’m here with tears in my eyes, blasting gangsta rap, just hot and wondering if I really am just WASTING my time with my twin flame.  I’ve heard so many horror stories about dating and I really don’t have much of a desire to date and I’m mostly okay just being single.  I’m upset though, really honestly wondering if I should just forget about my twin flame.  We haven’t talked in I don’t know how long and like most guys, he has his stupid little social media and his social media little groupie bitches.. I know I shouldn’t care, and that is why I deleted my account, for that exact reason – to not be distracted by all the BULLSH*T that is on there.  It’s just so hard.. Here I am, in my thirties, seeing my best friend have her second child and my big brother planning his wedding.  It’s so hard.. It’s impossible not to feel like I’ve been gypped out of a relationship.  UGHH!!! I hate that this stuff hurts me still.  This is what I was trying to evolve from and five minutes on evil facebook and all these insecurities come flooding back. And OF COURSE I went off on my twin flame before deleting my account.

He can kiss my ass right now.

I just want to guard my heart from this world. I wish my father could have warned me a little better about men and this world.  This world can be SO damn cold and evil..

ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I feel a little better, getting my anger out and I know in the back of my mind that this life is MY OWN and my life is about me and no one else and if I am meant to be with someone else then God will bless me with someone who is good for me, because my Lord has always blessed me and walks with me always.  In my darkest times, God has always come through and has remained by my side and I always feel his presence.  Therefore I will not be asking for anyone new to come into my life because that will only add fuel to the fire of this twin flame situation, no matter how my ego wants to hurt my twin flame SO BAD right now, but I’ve already done enough and I have kicked the sh*t out of his ego plenty.

All I can do is guard my heart, not let it grow ice cold like it was before, but just let it be GUARDED from now on, and not just gaping open, ready to be all broken and hurt.  It sucks that I’m soooooo sensitive, but I accept it because it is who I am, and it also helps with my psychic abilities and dreams.

Now that I’ve let that anger out, I’m just gonna relax and enjoy my night and do some more writing.  Why sit around all mad?

As for my twin flame, I’m focusing ONLY on ME now.

 

 

 

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